Life seems to be travelling by very quickly at the moment and it doesn't seem any time at all since I was here in bed writing my blogg - but it was actually a week ago. Now I have two weeks, or slightly less than two weeks, before I go off to Paris, then Doha and then off to Australia!!
I was at Barcelona airport yesterday when I felt a real rush of happiness, and realised that I just love to travel. I just love the process of travelling, I hadn't really realise that, I thought I liked being in new places but I realised I really do enjoy travelling. Given the way my life is going the fact I enjoy travelling is probably a very good thing!
I also enjoy being on my own. I've known for a while that I prefer to travel on my own, since Chris's death and particularly since Jimmy left home, I have been living completely on my own. Sometimes this has felt very lonely and I have yearned for someone to talk to, and quite often I have filled that gap by writing my blogg! At the moment I am very much on my own, the office has gone and I am just me! However the technology enables me to touch base with family and friends very easily, more often than not they are a long distance away, not just round the corner. I don't need to be on my own but more often than not, I am choosing to be on my own.
I have been thinking about choices, about consciously making choices, and the intention of choices. Choices are cumulative, they build up one on top of another, so a choice to do one thing can more easily lead to another thing happening with very little choice being seen to occur. Often we forget that we have choices. But we do - we are all making choices all the time and taking control of the small choices is the first crucial step in realising the big intentions.
The world is as it is because of the accumulation of the tiny little choices of all of us, made over the lifetimes of humankind. Everything that happens is as a consequence of the myriad of miniscule choices that we as individuals and humanity have made over lifetimes. There are 7 billion of us alive in this world at the moment, all making tiny choices impact on the totality of our existence. However our body is made up of 37 trillion cells yet it acts as one human being - me the individual - and that is quite extraordinary.
So since Chris's death I have been more aware and conscious of the choices that I have been making. Linked to that has been the intention my choices, what is the purpose of these small everyday decisions and choices? Not sure where these reflections are going apart from a clearer understanding that things happen in my life as a consequence of choices that I made previously, and that my future life will be as a consequence of the choices I make today!
But it is now time for me to get up and to go and see my Mum, the pen ultimate visit before I'm off to Australia....... and to count my blessings that I have that choice.....
