................ and it was?????????
Well the words that make most sense are...heart warming...... and tonight at home - my heart is very warm/sensitive/open... and on reflection I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by the intensity of the week.......
It was truly amazing though. I have never been to Turkey before and just loved how I connected to people - in an extra-ordinary way, and in many ways........... and not just once or twice, but again and again..... it was ... just that ... heart-warming - the more I do this - the more I connect with people, strangers, as well as colleagues and friends.. the more I love the connections I make, the joy of making things happen, recognising our creativity and our potential.... just connecting!
The conference in Ankara was just lovely - we were made so welcomed and the days and nights blend into a joyous memory of inspiration, happiness and amazing energy ... and dancing... truly magical... and it was good work.
Istanbul was different but also very special, a weekend on my own - in an amazing city, I am finding it hard to find words to describe how much I enjoyed it... it was a truly fantastical weekend - pretty bonkers but also pretty amazing. I feel I have learnt so much about myself this weekend... which sounds a bit weird - well not learnt - but consolidated thinking... like lots of things falling together like a jigsaw.. a lot of this is about me - and my intentions for the future.. which have been getting clearer for a while - it was like they all sort of settled inside me... recognising who I am.... going deeper and being totally honest with myself... and then just really being/living this person.. who by the way is pretty mind-blowing!
This intensity of love of life being magnified by my Mum going to hospital on Friday - and me being so far away but being kept informed... I called in on the way back from the airport and saw my Dad and will go with Jim to see my Mum tomorrow night - she was going to have to have an operation but it looks increasingly likely they can treat her without surgery. Which is good. My Dad today was amazing, he seems energised - his love for my Mother being his whole life.... and his pain that he wasn't able to use the phone on Friday because he is too deaf, when she needed to go to hospital.... and his comfort that my Mum had no pain when he visited her today, all giving him an increased reason/ability to live.... every second is precious when you are 94.............
Buff - this is life ... and sometimes it is so hard.. but also so beautifully preciously wonderful - my lovely Dad is so amazing.. he is home alone tonight.. my Mum in hospital... hard for both of them - on their own after a lifetime of sleeping together... he was so strong this afternoon.. inspirational.. all these thoughts adding to the Turkey wave of emotion!
So no conclusions here tonight... turmoil... but deep inside I am getting stronger...
Buffff that's what it's all about.
