am debating what to do.... which is interesting - I am increasingly living with such a strong feeling of certainty it is quite unusual to feel quite so uncertain! Wow - re-reading that - !!!! I know I live with certainty but seeing it in black and white is something else. Yes I do live with a very strong sense of certainty - it is very beautiful - I usually make decisions very quickly and feel very 'right' about them - that doesn't mean I always do the right/best thing - it means that I go with what feels 'right' at the time and then accept the consequences of my decisions - as 'what was meant to be!'
So I am living with a decision - probably quite a small one - but no decision is small as they all have consequence - my decision is whether to go to Spirithorse this weekend for an EI - and I now realise that I am trying to find reasons why not to go - which is weird because I was really looking forward to going - and part of me still does want to go - but there is also a part of me which really doesn't want to go - for some reason - as yet to defined.
Well blogg - I think I have made a decision - not certain why - but if I can write it so clearly that I don't want to go - then that is a feeling of certainty..... yet I hesitate - wow - there is a lot of uncertainty here!
OK - I think I am still tired from travelling - or more likely not sleeping whilst travelling - so maybe I should just accept this - sleep on my decision- I'm even hesitating to publish this blogg - I seem to have become a completely indecisive person - so if I am honest - which I try to be with my blogg - I should accept that I am going through a period of indecision - Ok and that's linked to feeling vulnerable and a bit lonely - but that's Ok too.
